♥ XOXO; ♥
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♥ The One
♥Elyn♥
9Teen.
020689.
Gemini
[23`]
Full Time Procrastinator
Avid recycler of drink cans in school.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
so it's 4.31am right now. i cannot sleep. this always happens when he's going off to KL.
i will reminisce and reminisce and reminisce about our long gone childish lovesick puppy years and get all sappy and teary-eyed. although i will miss him and all that it's beside the point. it's primarily because i'm worried about his well-being and all that. i am a mega paranoid, fyi.
i guess that's the thing with being in something with someone for so long. he grows into you. becomes this part of you that you cannot outgrow and outrun and you either see things as routine, or you see it as someone you look forward to everyday. i don't see how things can be routine anyway. maybe it's because i love details. more than the big picture. how sometimes a hug can be more significant than a dinner treat. how a spontaneous, thoughful gesture from him lets me know he still cares. how something he says that i know hasn't been crafted meticulously to make it sound romantic and right makes it all the more touching. how i know that he still has a soft spot despite the hard cover that he fronts sometimes.
it always feels funny, the first few days he isn't around.
sometimes i am scared of the future. there's only so much i can do to mould it but along the way inevitable things crop up to change what we've planned. after all, it's all in His hands.
I honestly cannot predict and foresee what will become of us. i mean regardless of the number of years, months or days, if fate calls it to be, he might end up being the last guy i ever want to be with.
but the thing with fate is, there's always hope. faith. and belief.
i have faith. in the Almighty.
I believe He hears me.
and with that, i pray, and i hope,
that what we have is built to last.
ahh. late night/early morning entries always have these predictable outcomes.
i shall force myself to fall into slumber.
i will reminisce and reminisce and reminisce about our long gone childish lovesick puppy years and get all sappy and teary-eyed. although i will miss him and all that it's beside the point. it's primarily because i'm worried about his well-being and all that. i am a mega paranoid, fyi.
i guess that's the thing with being in something with someone for so long. he grows into you. becomes this part of you that you cannot outgrow and outrun and you either see things as routine, or you see it as someone you look forward to everyday. i don't see how things can be routine anyway. maybe it's because i love details. more than the big picture. how sometimes a hug can be more significant than a dinner treat. how a spontaneous, thoughful gesture from him lets me know he still cares. how something he says that i know hasn't been crafted meticulously to make it sound romantic and right makes it all the more touching. how i know that he still has a soft spot despite the hard cover that he fronts sometimes.
it always feels funny, the first few days he isn't around.
sometimes i am scared of the future. there's only so much i can do to mould it but along the way inevitable things crop up to change what we've planned. after all, it's all in His hands.
I honestly cannot predict and foresee what will become of us. i mean regardless of the number of years, months or days, if fate calls it to be, he might end up being the last guy i ever want to be with.
but the thing with fate is, there's always hope. faith. and belief.
i have faith. in the Almighty.
I believe He hears me.
and with that, i pray, and i hope,
that what we have is built to last.
ahh. late night/early morning entries always have these predictable outcomes.
i shall force myself to fall into slumber.
Labels: there's only so many things that i can say although they don't come out right
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